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Thursday, August 19, 2010

Fictional Characters I'd Totally Do

It's Thursday and I'm feeling list-y! The other night I was watching TV and had one of those, "Aw, yeah, I'd hit that" moments. Don't pretend like you never have those. It got me thinking about other characters that flip my switch, light my fire, and make blood rush to areas of my body that shall remain nameless.

Here's my list. I hope you'll share yours in the comment section!

Jack Donaghey from 30 Rock.

"Rich 50 is middle-class 38."
No, not Alec Baldwin, his character Jack Donaghy. It's not even his suave good looks that I love, it's the smart, unapologetically-elitist ex-Bostonian CEO of NBC and GE Microwave Programming that I adore. He can be very sweet and sympathetic when he's not cracking me up, which is most of the time.

Holden Caulfield from The Catcher In The Rye.
The Catcher in the Rye
Oh, Holden. I've had a crush on this character since I was a teenager myself. I suppose I have an innate desire to "fix" this troubled young man, as if somehow I could be the buoy that tethers him to reality and makes him see that life can be beautiful if you let it.

I'm actually glad that author J.D. Salinger never sold the movie rights because I prefer to imagine Holden my own way without Hollywood ruining it with their version of him.

Most of the men from True Blood

With a few exceptions, I think most of the guys in this book series/cast are hotter than the surface of the sun. Sorry, Bill & Lafayette - you just do nothing for me.  Alcide and Eric are my favorites. HUMMANA-HUMMANA!


Eric Northman.  YUM.
I would howl at Alcide's moon anytime.


"The Dude" from The Big Lebowski
Coitus?

Yeah, I know he's not much to look at; in fact, he looks like he smells like dirty laundry (the whites), but any fan of this movie will tell you that El Duderino is all heart. He's drunk/high all the time, has no job, is behind in his rent, and is gullible beyond belief, yet we still love him. He's self-assured, sweet, and kind, and all The Dude wanted was his rug back. He's a good man, and thor-ah.

Michael Bluth from Arrested Development
"Hey, maybe you could pop a tent outside with your cousin Maeby."

You know I have a little thing for Jason Bateman, but I love Michael for Michael, not just because he's played by my long-time actor crush.  He's the responsible adult among a family of lunatics.  He's the straight man who slips little quips in under the radar; so subtly that you can miss them if you're not paying attention.  Plus, he's just adorable!  Look at his cute, tussled hair!  *sigh*  He's dreamy.

Bret & Jemaine from Flight of the Conchords.
It's business time.

No, they're not terribly hot guys, but they're hilarious and in case it isn't obvious already -- I find hilarious to be quite sexy.

Gloria from Modern Family
Eyes up here, people.


Yes, I'm straight, but the one woman I think I'd change teams for is Gloria, played by Sofia Vergara. I just love this character; she's funny and feisty, she's a great mom, and she seems to really love her old fart of a husband despite their glaring age difference. I love that she's flashy and always looks gorgeous. I love that she sticks up for herself and people that she loves. I love her accent. I love her amazing rack.

So there's my list.  Who's on yours?