Monday, March 8, 2010

OOBH Stew: Oscar Edition

Good Monday morning!

Who watched the Academy Awards last night? Show of hands...

(nodding head)

Okay, yup, yup. As I expected. Not many of you watched it all, and to be perfectly honest, neither did I. I get really bored during awards shows despite all of the sparkly celebrities, but I make it a point to watch the half-hour red carpet pre-show and the first 30-45 minutes of the show.

In this post I'm gonna hit the high points... right up until I went to bed.

I adore Neil Patrick Harris and he can do no wrong in my book. He opened the show Vegas-style with glitz, feathers, and a few off-color jokes that I'm sure bugged any prudish viewers right off the bat. Harold & Kumar reference = win.

Best of all, he sang live and nailed every note. LOVE.


Steve Martin & Alec Baldwin hosted, and they were okay. I love me some Alec and his delivery was spot on as always, but Steve seemed terribly rehearsed and stiff to me. Too much set up/punchline/laugh going on there, ya know? They wanted it to seem like they were riffing but they were clearly not.

Alec could have pulled it off; frankly I think next year they should have Alec and Tina Fey host!

One of the first commercial breaks of the night brought us an ad that made me stop and ask, "WTFF?" aloud.

News Flash!
Whoopi Goldberg routinely pees herself.




Ummm, oooooookay. Thanks for that, Whoopi.

Charlize Theron's dress made me crave sugary cinnamon buns for some reason. Odd.



Gabourey Sidibe (from Precious) looked beautiful. Yes, she's a big girl and it must be a stylist's ultimate challenge to outfit her for an event like this, but I love this dress!



The Brat Pack did not age well.



The John Hughes tribute started off so great, then became overly-long and uncomfortable, yes?

I supposed Jennifer Gray might have been there but no one would recognize her post-surgery mug anymore. Judd Nelson looks like a homeless terrorist and Alley Sheedy looks like she hasn't slept or seen the sun in several years. That shapeless black nightgown she was wearing certainly didn't help matters either.


I *heart* this man.



I know he is old enough to have fathered me, but I would still hit that like I was in a Toyota with a stuck gas pedal. What?

Miley Cyrus has terrible posture.



I just want to roll her shoulders back, knee her in the small of her back, and pull her head upwards. Take some yoga or horseback riding lessons or something, girly!

Sandra Bullock won. Good for her. As Jim put it, this movie was her "Erin Broccoli-Bitch." It's so not my kind of movie; in fact we got a bootleg copy of it from J's brother and kept it for a couple of months but never watched it. Meh.

I've always liked Sandra for some reason; maybe because her sister owns a bakery in Montpelier, VT, and Sandy showed up on opening day and slung some danishes to help out. I'm easy like that - I like when celebs act like normal people.

I admit it, I totally laughed at Ben Stiller's Avatar get-up.



I couldn't help it; I giggled. The fact that James Cameron seemed peeved by it only added to the awesomeness. Speaking of that....

It was a great night for ex-wives! Way to stick it to your a-hole ex, Kathryn! Woohoo! Any time I can see James Cameron taken down a few notches is a good night as far as I'm concerned, and how better to get revenge on your ex than by beating him at his own game and looking fantastic while doing so? Vindication.... Enjoy it, Kath!

Again, I haven't seen The Hurt Locker because I don't typically like war movies, but I might have to check this one out out of principle alone.

That's all I've got! I'm sure there were many more photos and moments to discuss, but I needed my beauty sleep, yo!

Did I miss anything?