"I'm Dr. Butts, Dr. Seymour Butts...

I'm making my rounds, and I'm a little behind...."

(From The Simpsons, back when it was funny)

Ok, I'm not really a doctor (but I do play one on TV), but I am egregiously behind in just about all aspects of my life right now. It's as if I just awakened from some kind of bizarre fog and found my bills unpaid, my laundry undone, my parents & friends owed phone calls, and ZERO Christmas presents purchased even though we have just 21 short shopping days to work with.

EEEK!