Someone needs a hobby

Wow. This is a new low.

As many of you know, I work with a crazy person who sits about 4 feet from me and talks my ear off three days out of my five day workweek. Her usual self-indulgent ramblings are about her cats ("they're just like a couple of kids!"), the one grown child she has who actually speaks to her (d'oh!), whatever home improvement project she has ordered her estranged husband to do that week, her health (diabetes, back trouble, eye problems...), what she had for breakfast, lunch, and dinner for the last few days (!), every stop she made on the way home from work and every task she did at home from morning till night, and every conversation or bit of praise she has ever had or received while working for the past 40 years.

Now, repeat these stories constantly over the course of almost 5 years on the job, and you get an idea of what kind of hell I find myself in for the majority of my work week. She seems to forget that she has told me these stories a thousand times, so not only was it boring and inane the first time I heard it, but after the third or fourth time, I'm about ready to jam pencils into my eardrums. Or hers.

Today, we've reached an all new low. She is actually sitting here reading me a lunch menu from some restuarant I've never been to and have no intention of ever going to.

Kill me.

Please.