Thursday, February 19, 2009

Stop the presses!

Today, my friends & neighbors, a minor miracle occured. You see, after nearly a full year of sitting on my tush, today I went back to the gym. I'll wait while you all pick your jaws up off of the floor and put your eyes back in your sockets.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~Doo-dee-doo-dee-dooo~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Ok, still with me?

Well, then, let me just tell you - it wasn't nearly as bad as I thought it would be! I'm sure I'll be feeling it tomorrow, but today I had no trouble hopping on the ol' elliptical trainer and doing 40 minutes! I burned 350 calories and went over 3 miles. I enjoyed the new cheesy music I'd downloaded for the occasion. Lady GaGa, I salute you for your infectious club groove, and Britney, baby, I am glad I never gave up on you. Nothing gets my ass moving like a little Mama Spears! Also, Kanye, you're still a dink, but for your awesome song "Stronger," you get a small Bev-pass. Just this once.

I was glad that nothing at all had changed at the gym during my little workout hiatus. I also remembered another gym perk - all the trashy gossip mags a girl could want, all for free! Yes, they're kind of gummed up and wrinkly, but who gives a crap? Not me!

The best part was that when I left I was truly, utterly proud of myself in a way that I haven't been in quite some time. Maybe it was that elusive "runner's high" that the fit people talk about, but I was downright giddy as I drove home. In fact, I can't wait to do it again!

In honor of my restored gym regimen, I'm posting a lovely picture of Jane Fonda's original workout video. I remember doing this video with my mom when I was a kid. She'd put up the doggy gates and put on her spandex and sweatband (hawt!), and before you can say "thigh dimples" we'd be huffing and puffing on the floor of the living room, scowling at Jane's perfectly sculpted ass. Ah, mem'ries.