The Most Unspooky Spooky Place

Good morning, my lovelies! Thank you all SO MUCH for your kind words of encouragement and congratulations yesterday. You all mean the world to me, and I do mean that from the bottom of my boogity, boogity shoe. Today I'm going to share a few pictures from our trip to Salem, MA last weekend.

Salem was cool, but not as bewitching as we'd hoped. We have heard that the month of October brings out hoards of freaks in costumes, live re-enactments of witch trials in the common, and a palpable supernatural air that settles over the quaint little town north of Boston during the most haunted month of the year.

Yeah, not so much. It's a pretty town and all, but it's a modern small city like any other. The attractions were very pricey and VERY lame, and something about seeing Ye Olde Hot Dog Vendors and a long line of bright blue Porta-Potties located next to the Witch Museum detracted from the ambiance we'd been expecting. Oh well - we still had fun with our little group of friends, and the kids got into character and delighted passers-by who were also looking in vain for something eery.

On the way to Salem we passed a liquor store with such a funny name that I had to lean over and take a picture immediately.  I know many of you have seen a pic of this place floating around on the internet, but FYI, they really do exist in the great Commonwealth of Massachusetts!

Yes, I'm talking about Bunghole Liquors.

No word on whether they sell TP

Moving along.... The coolest part of the day (aside from our time spent in Ye Olde Pub drinking Ye Olde Pumpkin Ale) was wandering around in a 300 year old cemetery.

The worst part of the day was forking over $25 for our family to wander through the world's WORST wax museum.

We had no idea that Gerard Depardieu was involved in the Salem Witch Hysteria of 1692.

Nathaniel Hawthorne doesn't look so good.

Jim, ever the English teacher, intoned, "It's a little-known fact that Nathanial Hawthorne was seldom seen without his 'Do Not Touch' sign, which he carried everywhere."  Laughter ensued, but sadly that was the coolest thing we heard/saw in the museum.

We made the best of it, right up until Mark got arrested and thrown into the slammer.

I have always suspected him of witchery.  This just confirmed it.

I was shocked to learn that one of my ancestors was one of the first female pirates in Salem.

Arrr, keep ye hands offa me booty!

Later we enjoyed some time in a local eatery before taking a haunted trolley ride and seeing a little show.  The kids had a ball.




 Then we went back to our hotel and fell asleep at 9 PM, because we're all party animals like that.

Fangs for the memories!  Ah ah ah!

So there you have it!  A fun-filled family adventure, minus the adventure part. 

Have a lovely Thursday, my friends. *mwah*

Crap. I'm Jeffrey's Mom.

Misery, thy name is Thursday.

Who us, misbehave?

Okay, maybe I'm being a little melodramatic. It happens. But I do feel like something the cat dragged in today. Yesterday was one of those busy, busy days. I set aside some time in the morning to do some work that didn't end up getting done, then drove all over the place in the pouring rain in the afternoon, collected the kids, fed them, dressed them in their new Celtics shirts, and got them to the basketball game in the middle of our very crowded little city - all by myself. The game started off okay -- the boys were excited but good; I got them the cotton candy I had promised along with a hideously-overpriced bottle of Aquafina, and we settled in to watch the team warm up.

Stink Eye Hamster disapproves

Within 5 minutes the woman in the seat in front of Danny was giving us the stink eye; then she asked him to stop kicking her chair.  And so it began.

The boys just could not sit still, and apparently all of the people around us had no children and no recollection of ever BEING children themselves. I'm not sure how many of you BOOBHs are familiar with New Englanders and their ways, so allow me to fill you in.

I love my people, but they are sometimes not an overly friendly bunch. Once you get to know them they're lovely and will give you the shirts off their backs, but crowds of strangers tend to be polite, reserved, and above all, quiet. I'm not a big sports person so this was one of my first times braving a bunch of die-hard fans who wanted to watch this pre-season game with ZERO interruptions, but let's just say that this is one of the main reasons that I've never gone to a baseball game. Quite simply, Red Sox Nation terrifies me. I wouldn't last two minutes among them.

They start 'em young

That being said, the row in front of us last night were not the friendly, "Oh, that's okay! He's just excited!" types of people. They were stink eye-givers to the Nth degree.

I want so badly to be a fun mom. I AM fun, damn it, so all I want is to be able to go to these functions and be goofy and have a good time with my kids.  Yet because I also seem to have a crippling fear of bothering other people, I wind up feeling like the uptight mom who's constantly correcting the kids. M was a wiggly mess by the end of the first quarter - a 40 lb. ball of sneakers and sticky hands who just wanted to run and be freeeeeeee. He kept lying on the disgusting stadium floor trying to worm his way towards the center aisle by army crawling under my legs.  Of course, I wasn't having any of that.

During the time-outs they'd play loud music & show other kids in the stadium boogying, so both the boys would dance, which I encouraged... except D's version of dancing involves making a weird angry face and punching his arms and legs out aggressively in all directions. M then imitates him, so I have two spasmodic punching machines surrounded by frowning, disapproving seat-mates. At one point as I struggled to hold M in my lap so he wouldn't make another break for it, he may or may not have graaaaaazed the head of the woman in front of me with his foot. She was not amused.

I love it when my face sweats

It was exhausting and my good spirits quickly vanished. Jim finally arrived at halftime, at which point both kids seemed to deflate and allow the fact that it was 90 minutes past their very strictly-enforced bedtime to sink in. We had a brief period of them sitting quietly with blank expressions on their faces while I told Jim why I was a sweaty, peevish mess. Their calmness didn't last though, and I finally grabbed my youngest and headed for the door just before the end of the 3rd quarter. At least I beat the traffic getting out of the parking garage, but still. S-s-suuuuuckage.

It will be a very long time before we attempt another professional sporting event; at least 3-4 years. Just thinking about it makes me exhausted all over again!  I was so excited about this event, but when all is said and done the whole thing left me frazzled, sweaty and discouraged.  I was, and am, Jeffrey's mom.



I don't wanna be Jeffrey's mom!

*sigh*

I adore my children, but I think I need to buy stock in Clairol what with all the gray hairs they're giving me lately!  We're taking the boys out of town this weekend on an overnight trip to a crowded city, so I can't wait to see what fresh hell Saturday will bring.  I am truly a glutton for punishment.

I Refuse To Let Today Suck: A List

Today is shaping up to be one of those days. You know those days - the ones that suck despite all of your efforts to make it not suck? Here's a list of some tiny odds & ends that have added up this morning. I'm bulldozing my way through them because I simply refuse to be annoyed. Much.

1. Overslept. Kids wouldn't get dressed and pulled all of the sheets and blankets off of my bed while I was in the shower.

2. Sugar bowl empty. Must take 30 extra seconds to find sugar bag and refill it. Goddamn it.

3. Discover evidence of someone sneaking pieces of chocolate cake: smeared frosting all over the counter & cake container. Collar the perps by the tell-tale chocolate stains on their faces and hands.

4. Out of milk. Kids ONLY want the Frosted Flakes that I never buy but allowed them to get as a treat last week. Whining ensues.

5. Due to his multiple potty training-related accidents over the weekend, M is out of underwear. Sent to school wearing saggy drawers that belong to his older brother. (What? At least they're clean!)

6. Kitten makes mad dash for open door in futile bid to escape. I briefly consider joining her.

7. Gas light on in car. Spend drive to school calculating how many more miles I can go before having to stop for fuel.

8. Forget momentarily that the nasty old bitch at the daycare who hates us has no manners and give her a cheery, "Good morning," which is met by icy silence. Kick myself for always expecting the best from people who have consistently proven themselves to be jackasses.

9. Spend first 30 minutes of work day listening to Cat Lady prattle on about how she hassled her doctor's office all day Friday to find out whether or not she has pneumonia. She doesn't, so Cough Fest '10 continues today uninterrupted. Yaaaaay.

10. Try to book haunted trolley ride for our trip to Salem this weekend and find that it's sold out. Thankfully Laurie calls and takes care of it because she is magical and somehow she can always fix these types of things. She also managed to find the most kid-friendly restaurant in town and make us a reservation there, too. LOVE that!

As you can see, it has been a rather trying morning but I'm determined to persevere! My weekend was good; we passed on everyone's kind offers to hang out and spent the entire weekend sitting around in pajamas. It was awesome not to have to go anywhere or be social for a change, and I love that my kids enjoy occasionally doing absolutely nothing as much as we do.



Ok, just one more item for my list, and then I'll cut the cord on this hot mess of a post. A few months ago we bought some (rather expensive) tickets to see the Boston Celtics play the Philadelphia 76ers in a pre-season game right here in Manchester. We were psyched because hey, we don't even drive down to Boston, right?
Plus, the game is on Wednesday which happens to be our anniversary, so what's better than bringing our adorable spawn to their first professional basketball game to celebrate their parents' happy union? We had plans to go out to dinner beforehand and visions of green t-shirts and giant foam fingers dancing in our heads.

Then last week we found out that Jim has parent-teacher conferences that night, so he'll miss the first half of the game and I get to bring two amped-up little boys to a crowded sporting event by myself. Because sports are SO my thing. *eyeroll*

Oh well. C'est la vie! Let's hope this week gets nothing but better as it rolls along, shall we?

*Kisses*

Toy Makers are Sickos

The other night we celebrated my youngest son's 3rd birthday. I was sick so mostly I just threw some presents and cake at him and then lay on the couch while they opened and played with the new swag, but it was still a joyous occasion. Let's face it - every birthday takes us one step further away from changing poopy diapers, so I'm all for it!

One present stood out from the rest, however, and I can't quite put my finger on why that is.

It's a Leap Frog product, so it's edumacational!

Hmmmm. Does anybody else think that this looks a little... um... inappropriate for a toddler? It's quite fancy, really; it lights up and offers word games and songs, and the head tip top is all nubby so it offers lots of sensory stimulation. Heh heh. Stimulation, indeed.

EW! Bad visuals! Stop, stop!




I've often thought that the people who dream up kids' toys are a little on the pervy side. Remember my post about Backdoor Elmo last year?

Who's making this crap, Hugh Hefner?

Anyway, the kid got lots of new toys, so I doubt he'll miss this one. What? Shut up! Gotta run!
XOXO

Don't Panic!

Hey there! What's shakin'?

All's well here today. Last night we had my husband's family over for a big lobster dinner, which was groovy. We all had a good time eating, drinking, and shooting the shite for several hours. It was through this shite-shooting that I found out that our security here at the OOBH has been breached.





Nobody panic!

*deep breaths*

Not panicking!


It seems that both of my sisters-in-law (hi, J & A!) have been known to swing by the OOBH on occasion. Apparently even my two BILs have glanced at it. I suddenly feel like I'm having that dream where you're naked in front of a room full of people.

It's all good, I don't mind. I've never made my blog a secret, per se, I just never really talked about it to family. My loyal readers will also note that I don't ever say anything bad about family or friends here, because I always knew this day would come. My sister and her husband both read the OOBH, so it's not like I was doing this on the down-low or anything.

But still.

When my MIL said, "You have a blog? How do I find it?" I replied, "You don't."

Sorry... but come on. Siblings are one thing, but I really would rather keep the seedier side of Bev away from parental units, ya know?

Dat's just how I roll, cuz.

I admit that I vacillate between this:


And this:



So no, nothing will change here. I won't edit myself or become self-aware. I started writing this blog because I love to write and I love to talk about silly crap like boobs and celebrities and celebrity's boobs, and that hasn't changed. In fact, since I've found an audience of like-minded pervs, I'm more hooked on blogging than ever!

I won't edit myself; I'll just continue to exercise restraint when it comes to talking about stuff that could potentially hurt someone's feelings.

Ok, so now ya' know. We now resume our regularly scheduled frivolity.



XOXO

Dog Days of Summer

Hey now! How are ya? I'm okay, just plugging along through another boring old weekday. Today is July 1st though, which is awesome. July is my favorite month of the year, and not just because my birthday is right smack-dab in the middle of it, either!

Reasons why July rocks:

- Warm weather & and blue skies
- Everything is lush and green
- The Atlantic is finally warm enough (ish) to swim in without risking hypothermia.
- I take vacation days, so I'm at work less than any other month.
- Did I mention I have a birfday coming up? :)

This year I'm throwing myself having a party for my mumbledy-fifth b-day, and I'm already excited even though it's a few weeks away. I ordered invitations and everything, and I'm asking my guests to wear something sparkly and fabulous for the occasion! Of course, I haven't sent the invites yet, so I sure hope people come... but I'll worry about that another day.

Anyhooters, today I want to talk about furry friends. No, not those kind, ya pervs, the kind that say "woof" and "meow."

Recently I've been feeling the urge to get a family pet. I grew up with a virtual menagerie of animals - we had dogs, cats, horses, rabbits, hamsters, and ducks, to name a few. However, 2009 was the Year of Doom for us; not only did we lose special and important people in our lives, but we also lost the 7 year-old German Shepherd we'd raised from an 8 week old ball of fur, my 14 year old feline BFF, and Jim's horrible, half-wild, annoying cat too. All in one year. It was a rough year at Casa de Bev.

This year is the first time in my life that I've been pet-less.

(Not to be confused with "pants-less," which I am quite often. Don't act so shocked; this is ME we're talking about!)



We've enjoyed the freedom, sure. It's nice to go on vacation and not worry about boarding the dog, and it's great to stay out of the house for 12+ hours with the family without having to rush home to let the dog out. It has been kind of nice.



But we all still have pangs of missing our furry friends. I still wish my cat would come curl up on the arm of the couch and purr while I watch TV at night. I still reach for my dog's big triangular head when I walk in the door. One thing I don't miss: vacuuming up all that hair!



Last night I was home alone and I realized how much I miss having a big old dog lying in the living room with me. I flashed back to all those times when I'd hear some noise and perk up at the same time as my dog, who'd lift his big head off the floor and look at me, suddenly alert. We'd hold eye contact with identical "what was that?!" expressions for a moment before he'd give a low growl and set to barking his head off. I never worried about people messing with us when we had a 110 lb. GSD in the house.



I miss him. For all the annoyances pets can be (I'm not looking forward to potty-training another puppy, for instance), they add so much to our families. Jim misses having a hiking companion. I like taking care of people and animals.

I think I'll start browsing ads again. Why not? We all need a little extra love in our lives.



Speaking of cats & dogs, I found this clip and literally LOL'ed. It's short and predictable but still so worth watching.

What if Lassie were a cat?



That's it for today, amigos. Have a good one, and I'll see you tomorrow for an especially chunky batch of OOBH Stew!

And we're BACK!

OH EM GEE, guys. I'm so sorry I dropped off the face of the planet last week, but unbeknownst to me, the townhouse we shared with our friends on vacation had NO internet access.

ACCCKKKKKKK!!!

It took several days for the withdrawal shakes to subside, but once they did I actually enjoyed being unplugged for a while. Sort of. A little.

Ok, I missed you so badly that it buuuuuuuuuuuuurned! Are you happy now?



Anywho, the vacay was FAB, and it was so nice to get away from my crap job for an entire week. Today I'm back and hating every minute of it, but I'm trying not to dwell. We got home last last night so I haven't had a moment to even upload my photos, but I'll share a few choice pics ASAP.

Everything went perfectly and exceeded our expectations. I won't rub it in, but I'll give you the Cliff Notes version:

The GOOD:

- The kids were amazing. They behaved, had fun, were cute and polite, and let me cuddle them and smother them with kisses. It... was awesome.

- All three families got along great! There were 13 of us total - 6 adults and 7 kids ranging in ages from 2 1/2 to 13 years old.

- Disney and Sea World kicked ass! D was tall enough to do all the rides at Disney and sat in the very first car on Space Mountain.

- The pool at this place was outstanding; it had a water slide and a lazy river.

- Great weather, but due to my diligent application of sunblock no one got a sunburn!

- We all got our nerd on at Medieval Times and it was a BLAST.

- Mimosas for breakfast every day.

The BAD:

- We did not get to see Elliott. :( Sunday got all FUBAR'ed because our check-in was much later than we anticipated, and by the time we got into where we were staying the kids were done-zo (read: too cranky to abandon while we went to dinner). We tried to reschedule but Elliott & Lori had work obligations. BOO. Now I'll have to go to farging Ohio to meet them.

- On the last night I dinged up my shin/knee on the hot tub. It is now a delightful shade of purple and yellow. Stupid champagne!

- D got carsick. Twice. I don't know if I'll ever get the smell of barf out of my car! For the record, vomit consisting of cheeseburger and chocolate milk will make you want to jump out of a moving car at top speed, but puke consisting of chicken nuggets and Gatorade? Not so bad. Except for the staining factor, that is.

- Vacations are expensive. I'm now broke as a joke till further notice!

- Did I mention NO INTERNET?!



The Amtrak Auto Train was an interesting experience, and on the way down we loved it. It was half-empty and everyone on board was families like ours, heading to Disney. But on the way home... it was completely full, it took forever, and the average age of the passengers was about 85. Seriously. Not just old people, but decrepid old people, some of whom where cranky and clearly didn't like children. When we walked into the waiting area it was just a sea of gray heads. There was only one other family on board, and thankfully we were seated near them.

Ok, that's it for now. I have a mountain of work to tackle and 143 unread messages in my inbox, I haven't touched base with any friends yet, and don't even talk to me about my messy house or unpacked suitcases!

But yes, it was worth it.

I'll be Maverick; you can be Goose.

Hi all! Good weekend?

Mine was okay, but nothing to write home (or blog) about. Yet, here I sit wanting to write something despite my glaring lack of good material. Now I know what it must be like to be a writer on SNL!

On Saturday morning I took my kids on a cub scout outing to the NH Air National Guard in Concord. The guardsmen were very accomodating and even let the kids climb all over one of their helicopters for quite a while, then landed a copter and gave a little show of what it could do outside while we watched inside. Very cool!

The only buzzkill was my oldest son, who woke up that morning with a bug up his arse and the word, "No" punctuating every sentence he uttered. I swear to dog, if I didn't love him so much I would have left him with the guardsmen until he was old enough to enlist. He started his Asshole Tour of Duty (AToD) by taking the pilot's seat and refusing to give it up to other kids for turns, then we got down to brass tacks when he took off across the hanger towards a roped-off high security section and wouldn't come back.

Oh, and remember the part about how I have no voice and am also in charge of keeping my 2 year old from hurting himself while climbing around in a helicopter? Yeah, that was also happening. Did any of the other parents in our pathetic little den offer to help when they saw me struggling, voiceless, to calm a tantruming 65 lb. six year old who refused to do anything I asked, even go to the bathroom? Nope, they sure didn't. Great job, folks - it takes a village!

Rest assured that when I finally wrestled the kids back into the car and calmed down for a minute, D felt mom's wrath. He lost his new mp3 player (a hand-me-down from J), his lunch trip to McDonald's, and his afternoon playdate with my friend Jill's daughters. So THERE.

The moral of this story: Mom may not be able to git' ya when you're being bad, but you'll pay later. Oh yes, you'll pay.

You mess with the bull, you get the horns.



Yesterday was even more dull. The high point was a trip to BJ's in which I bought a bunch of stuff because I had some killer coupons, then I forgot to use said coupons at check-out because YOU KNOW WHO decided to goof around and distract me. Yes, the AToD continued as he tried to push the cart away (with his brother in it) as I struggled to pay, load the cart, and make myself heard by the annoyed cashier. That little brain fart cost me about $20. Sigh.

It was really just more proof that I shouldn't have left the house at all, and I wouldn't have if we weren't at Defcon 5 thanks to a severe diaper shortage and a case of the toddler ploppy-poos.

By the time my husband and his brother came home from their calm, delightful day of skiing, I was a wee bit frazzled. I passed off tortellini-boiling duties and retreated to my room to regroup.


I know a lot of you probably enjoyed the Super Bowl last night. I didn't watch; I don't really "do" sports. What I did find myself zoning out to for a good 20 minutes last night was this:

Puppy Bowl IV.


Good gravy, is there anything cuter than 3 month old puppies? Fuzzy puppies, fat puppies, skinny puppies, puppy tummies, puppy breath... just... PUPPIES!

Yes. I dislike sports and love puppies. SO? It's good to be a girl.

A mom? The jury's out on that one.

Here's to a better week ahead!

You'll shoot your eye out, kid!

Why hello all of you Who's down in Whoville! How the hell are ya?

How was your holiday? Did everyone get spoiled by the big fat man in the big red suit (or equivalent)? I sure hope so! My Christmas was very nice. I got some lovely and thoughtful gifts and really enjoyed watching my children paw through their new loot. We finally relented and gave D a Nerf gun, and he was jazzed beyond belief when he cracked it open at 6 AM on Christmas morning. The darn thing is like an automatic weapon; you load 35 darts into the chamber (which, incidentally, don't hurt at all when you get pelted with them... ask me how I know) and let 'em rip! I have a feeling we're going to be finding those little buggers everywhere from now on. He's already lost at least 10 of them somewhere in the post-present mess that is my home.

I left my husband at home today with strict instructions to tidy the pig sty in preparation for his parents' arrival this evening. They are staying for most of the week and if I don't make sure things are clean I find his mother passive-aggressively helpfully cleaning out my oven or scrubbing the shelves of the fridge. Trust me, there's nothing like finding your mother-in-law folding a laundry basket full of your ugliest, most tattered period underwear to motivate you to get the chores done before they show up!

On Saturday night we went to an "Ugly Sweater Party" at Laurie & Mark's house. I'm pleased to report that we don't own any ugly sweaters despite my Aunt Carol's best efforts in that area, so I went to Walmart and found a perfectly hideous top for myself. I thought I'd win for sure, but then Laurie's friend Karyn showed up decked out in a snowman sweater with matching earrings, necklace, and socks. She blew me out of the water, and that was one contest I honestly didn't mind losing.

On a side note, last week on Facebook I posted something about having over-tweezed one of my eyebrows. So I'm standing in the kitchen chatting away when our friend Ric blurts out, "I can't stop staring at your eyebrows!" Crap! Lesson learned.

I decided to let the boys look like their usual adorable selves with the exception of D's hair. After his bath I had formed it into a spiky faux-hawk and he LOVED it, so out came the hair products to make it official. He was completely psyched to sport the 'do all night, but Jim wasn't as psyched. He is totally anti-hair gel, which is why my husband is a grown man who rocks a bushy bowl cut no matter how well it is cut. Whatev. I pick my battles.

Our friend Mark designed his own sweater. Looks nice, right?



Look closer:



HAHAHA! Is it any wonder that we are friends?

Towards the end of the evening we cracked open their new Beatles Rock Band game and rocked it out for a while. So much fun! A little birdy told me that we're getting that game for Christmas this week as well, and I can't wait. New Year's Eve jam session, here we come!

This is BY FAR my favorite photo from the whole holiday season:



CRAZY EYES! WOOT!

On Sunday D and I joined the Mala clan for lunch and a movie. We saw the Alvin & The Chipmunks Squeequel and it was... a movie. Mala was cracking up because I made it an hour and forty minutes into the film before leaning over to her and saying, "Well, now that's just improbable!" Yes, folks, I managed to suspend my disbelief during a movie about singing, talking chipmunks right up until they pelted a 6 foot tall man with their tiny little motorcycle helmets and made him fall down. That, well, that I didn't buy. No sir.

ANYWHO. It's another short work week for me. In fact, I'm only working for a few hours today and all day tomorrow, then I'm off for the rest of the week. YAY, me! I have a couple of special posts worked out for your entertainment this week, so stay tuned for those!

I'm going to be eating lettuce and drinking H20 all week in an attempt to lose the 4 lbs of fudge I've packed onto the ol' derriere recently. *sigh*

Enjoy your days, luvs!

Stalking Santa is frowned-upon

Why should this year be any different?


I'm always on Santa's naughty list, and that's just the way I like it! If you're not naughty, how do you have any fun at all?

ANYWHO, enough about naughty ol' Bev.

On Saturday night we took the kids on a train ride to "The North Pole." Each year the Believe in Books Literacy Program puts on a special event based on the children's book The Polar Express. Tickets are hard to get; there is a lottery system due to the limited seating and popularity of the show. My mother heard about it ages ago and started entering us all in the lottery every year. It took her three years, but she finally got the call a couple of months ago and we were able to get tickets.

D was sooo excited when he first caught a glimpse of the train (it's back there somewhere but you'll have to take my word for it).




The train ride is very short, but just like in the book the children are served hot chocolate and chocolate candies with nuggat centers. Once the train arrives at the "North Pole" there is a little show where the elves greet you, the book is read aloud, and then Santa comes out and greets every child in the place and gives out the "first gift of Christmas."



My kids were pretty determined to get some face-time with the Big Guy, so when he started making his rounds D was front and center, grinning at him. Santa kindly said hello to him and shook his hand, then continued on around the room. Before I knew it D had followed him and he managed to shake Santa's hand AGAIN. Jim and I kind of chuckled awkwardly and steered D back to our seats, but then next thing we know little M is heading towards Santa, so D ran over to "help" his brother say hello. Poor Santa - every time he turned around he saw a pair of blond brothers in matching green pajamas! By the third time he kind of stood back and looked down his nose at D and then said, "Are you two related? Haven't I seen you before?"

The whole thing is pretty special for the kids, and mine just loved it! On the train ride home each child gets a little jingle bell from Santa's sleigh, just like in the book. What could have been supremely cheesy was actually kind of magical, and personally, this Bah Humbugger really needed some magic this year.

Good times.

My favorite picture of the night was taken during dinner before the show. We stopped at a pizza place and M had just woken up and was quite cranky. He kept staring at us like he didn't even recognize us and we were starting to fear that people would think we'd kidnapped the kid! Finally he retreated to the corner to get his bearings:



What a SCOWL!

It was a nice weekend, all in all. The company dinner party on Friday night was fine; no surprises. As always I got in a few good jokes after a glass of wine and all of my uptight idiot coworkers act like I'm "coming out of my shell."

"You're so much fun, Beverly!" They say, surprised.
"I'm always fun," I reply tartly.

Fuck 'em. Jerks who do nothing but bitch about coffee, carpet stains, and dead rodent smells don't deserve Fun Bev - they'll get Surly Bev and they'll like it, by God.

In other news, I'm one follower away from reaching that magical number: 69. You know how I'm gonna feel about that:

EXCELLENT!


Have a good Monday, everyone!